I’ve been reading a lot of resturant reviews while planning my upcoming trip to Savannah. ‘The Hostess City’ boasts a record amount of exceptional drinking and dining establishments, and I’m having trouble narrowing down the choices for my brief visit.
Southern humorist and beloved writer Lewis Grizzard gave Mrs Wilke’s Boarding House an adoring rave in a 1986 edition of the Gettysburg Times, declaring it ‘The best place to eat on planet earth.’
Thirty-five years later, Mrs Wilkes is still serving a Southern family style lunch from 11 to 3pm every weekday. No reservations and no credit cards accepted. I’m curious to find out if their mac n cheese and fried flounder are indeed ‘best on Earth.’
Most restaurant critics are not as kind as our jovial Mister Grizzard. My personal Savannah favorite, James Beard award winning destination The Grey, was severely critiqued by the New York Times, sighting that ‘a whole oven-roasted sea bass was brutally overcooked and sloppily filleted.’ Ouch. Regardless, it’s never been easy to get reservation there. I placed mine for this Saturday over two months ago!
How important are restaurant reviews, really?
Movies like Mystic Pizza and Ratatouille have convinced us that professional critics are terrifying, villainous, connoisseurs capable of making or breaking a chef’s career.
It would seem Pete Wells of the New York Times is one such critic. If you google ‘worst restaurant review ever’ the top result will be Wells’ sharply amusing critique of Guy Fieri’s Guy’s American Kitchen & Bar in Times Square.
Somewhere within the yawning, three-level interior of Guy’s American Kitchen & Bar, is there a long refrigerated tunnel that servers have to pass through to make sure that the French fries, already limp and oil-sogged, are also served cold?
No stars were awarded, though I can’t imagine this bothered Mister Fieri or his fans much! Where else could one go to seek flavortown favs like donkey sauce?!
Sometimes a bad review just means more press. As Warhol famously proclaimed, “Don't pay any attention to what they write about you. Just measure it in inches.”
Shortly before the start of the pandemic, Pete Wells wrote a good many inches delivering a brutal zero star review to NYC steakhouse institution Peter Luger. The headline alone cut like a knife: “Peter Luger used to Sizzle. Now it sputters.” For weeks this editorial diss seemed to be all anyone could talk about. Peter Luger even issued a statement in response, and their loyal customers rallied in supportive outrage.
A few months later we had bigger problems than Wells describing Luger’s shrimp cocktail as cold latex dipped in ketchup. The pandemic shuttered indoor dining, forcing restaurants to restructure or close altogether. Many struggled to survive. But as the restaurant industry adapted, so did the critics.
The New York Times published its first ever takeout review in February 2021, covering Brooklyn Vietnamese newcomer, Falansai. It was a glowing review, praising not only the savory cuisine, but also the carefully labeled, compostable, takeout containers. No stars were issued, as the star rating system had been suspended during the pandemic.
For a short while it seemed that restaurant critics were wielding their power for good, driving business to local restaurants and encouraging readers to support the struggling restaurant industry.
But as indoor dining returns to full capacity, the gloves are coming off. Pete Wells recent controversial review of fine dining mecca 11 Madison Park felt like a sure sign that the pandemic is winding down. This ‘Masterful Takedown’ attacked the ethics of 11 Madison’s new all vegan menu, as much as the flavors.
Almost none of the main ingredients taste quite like themselves in the 10-course, $335 menu the restaurant unwrapped this June after a 15-month pandemic hiatus. Some are so obviously standing in for meat or fish that you almost feel sorry for them.
Personally, a $335 vegan tasting menu would have me asking where’s the beef (and caviar!)?
These days everyone is a critic. Yelp and Google reviews allow customers to flex their inner connoisseur (as well as giving them a place to rant about trivial unpleasantries).
I tend to skip customer’s written reviews, but I do LOVE to look at their pictures. Tagged photos on Instagram and Google tell the real tale of what’s going on in a restaurant.
After careful consideration, I’ve made my reservations for Savannah. I’ll be dining at The Grey, The Olde Pink House, and Husk, returning to Clary’s and Artillery Bar, and trying out Wyld, The Original Pinkie Masters, and brunch at Collins Quarter. A visit to the Forsyth Park Greenmarket is also on the agenda.
Have any Savannah suggestions for me? Send them my way. I always have time for another cocktail.
Next week’s newsletter and podcast will be coming straight from Savannah. I look forward to dispatching from my favorite Southern City. See you soon! 🥂